Who Buys These Things?

Archive for the 'Celebrities' Category

The Winds of Change

Keep track of frequently changing gusts of hot air with this handcrafted Donald Trump weathervane.

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Does this mean the windshield wiper fluid is saliva?

Step aside, Herbie — there’s a new Love Bug in town. The Gene Simmons VW beetle, formerly a radio station promo car, is yours for a mere $10,000.

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Put some ‘dub’ in your step

Hand-painted Skrillex & deadmau5 shoes. Instead of “click-click-click”, these high heels go “WHOMP!-WHOMP!-WHOMP!” when you walk.

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Remembering Whitney Houston

Whitney Houston’s death last weekend has spawned an outpouring of remembrances and fan tributes, from tearful eulogies delivered by high-profile celebs at her funeral, to the less publicized (and occasionally more interesting) sale of Whitney-themed memorabilia on eBay and Etsy.

Crafty-minded sellers are rendering her likeness on everything from memorial plaques and wine barrels to night lights and doll heads.

I wonder what it’s like to direct a choir of angles? “Acutes, you’re starting the refrain too early. And let’s hear a little more from the Obtuse section, please.”

“How Will You Know where the bathroom is in the middle of the night? Whitney will guide you.”

Looking for a wearable tribute that shows everyone how much you loved Whitney? Consider this leather jacket:

Some of Whitney’s own tour fashions are also up for sale, including this Marc Bouwer-designed catsuit and beaded tights:

Sunglasses sold separately.

And finally, there are the Whitney-themed domain names: dozens of web addresses, from OfficialWhitne​yHouston.com and WhitneyHoust​onfanclub.co​m to my personal favorite, the über-classy CRACK IS WHACK.COM:

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Gentlemen, start your engines…

Season 4 of RuPaul’s Drag Race continues tonight (if you don’t get Logo, or don’t live near a bar that gets Logo, you can watch the show on the website. Also, you should move.)

Fortunately, I do get Logo (as well as live near plenty of bars), so tonight you’ll find me waving my Absolut Vodka pom-poms as I root for Pittsburgh’s very own Sharon Needles!

“Two-four-six-eight! Let’s-drink-until-we-can’t-see-straight!
Three-five-seven-nine! Out of vodka? Switch to wine!”

Ahem. Anyway, back to the show… Sharon easily won the first week’s challenge with her eerily gorgeous post-apocalyptic couture:

The next week she pulled a 180, donning the type of girly garb more typically seen on Betsey Johnson’s runway during Fashion Week:

Both times she was stunning. Who knows what fashion tricks she has up her sleeve for this week? Will she return to the dark side? After all, this is Sharon Needles who does Marilyn Manson better than Marilyn Manson. But this girl is versatile, and clearly loves surprises. No matter what she wears, I’m sure she’ll be a knockout. Sharon, honey, your fans are waiting with baited breath! Good luck tonight!

And remember:

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Best seats in the house

Nothing says luxury like a hand-carved leather toilet seat:

Don’t believe me? Just ask “The Happy Hemptress”, shown here proudly displaying her classy rose-and-pot-leaf themed seat:

Just look at that big grin! That toilet seat sure is making her happy! Just think how much happier you would be if you were greeted by that every time nature called.

But maybe you’re aiming (heh) for something more upscale? Perhaps a seat emblazoned with a famous designer logo is more your style:

Or an Amy Winehouse tribute toilet seat that’s both “bejeweled and shellacked” (much like its namesake!)

I’m actually quite fond of this toilet seat featuring gay pulp paperback covers — only I fear I’d be consumed trying to read them all and forget why I went in there in the first place:

This next one poses an interesting metaphysical dilemma: If said “dump” is in progress, then why is the lid down? And if the lid is up and the sign thus obscured, is the aforementioned activity actually happening? Wouldn’t this make more sense as a sign on the door?

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Glue Blood

Sadly, Grandma has since been banned from the crafts room at the nursing home.

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Nobody ever called Bill O’Reilly an “egghead”

Until now…

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If it’s good enough for a celebrity, it’s good enough for you.

Why settle for an autograph when you can be the proud owner of George Clooney’s old VCR or Barbara Streisand’s favorite book of needlework?

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The closest you’ll ever get to Cher’s underwear


Framed and ready to adorn your wall: Cher’s bra, complete with a signed photo.

As the auction states: “There is not anyone who hasn’t stopped and stared at this piece on display as they walked by because of its uniqueness.”

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